It's Me, Not You.

Paranoia is you thinking that people are out to get you. Side-effects of being paranoid is not being vulnerable to people who care. You get good at deflecting, making it about others rather than yourself. I know this because I deflect in the way that I write. The first few sentences are about you, not me.

I don't like drawing attention to myself, I calculate what to share to people, and I never reveal much to anyone. I see vulnerability as a weakness. The paranoid part in me comes as a defence mechanism to not come across a certain way to specific people. It's mostly to avoid coming across weak, insecure, or vulnerable.